Confessions.

Hi there, it’s been a while since I posted anything on here.

My family and I have been going through one hell of a rough patch lately; we have unexpectedly lost a my dear father.

That is the major reason why I couldn’t face my computer, as  I knew if I wrote anything… I’d end up in tears!

Besides us having to learn to live without my father, I have been going through a struggle of my own. I have been in a “don’t give a ****” mood when it comes to food. I haven’t been caring about what I put in my body; trigger foods were welcomed with no hesitation. I’m talking about deep fried food, fast food, tomato based items, sodas and junk food. However, I didn’t give up on the fruits, veggies and the healthy meals during that time. It just became as if anything was “okay” for me to it. I have no idea if that makes sense!

This mood started before my dad passed away and I can’t figure out why!

You would think I’d go back to eating healthy after he passed… nope, It got worse. I was in a dark hole of lack of caring about what I ate; as long as it was some sort of food item that sustained me, I was good.

Don’t get me wrong, I knew what I was doing but just didn’t care. I knew the consequences will catch up with me fast and I was waiting for it.
I can’t remember a day that I didn’t have a weird bowl movement or cramp.
I slept with a heat pad every night, hoping to calm things down.

I think I hit rock bottom with this mood when I had to go the ER last sunday due to having bad bowel movements for 4 days along with vomiting and severe cramps. NONE of my medications were effective, hence the visit to the ER. I was so out of it that I don’t quite know if the Dr said I have a slight case of the stomach flu or just really really bad case of IBS. Either way, it was bad.. I couldn’t go into work, I could barely eat for days or keep anything down for that matter.

I have been slowly regaining my appetite and positive outlook on life. I am breaking the vicious “I don’t give a ****” cycle and getting back to my healthy self.

My advice to myself and anyone going through something similar: Listen to your body, stop ignoring it…you are what you eat!

Hope everyone is doing better than I am.

Live life to the fullest flavours,

Mariann xo

Forgive me bowels for I have sinned.

As humans we are known to underestimate previous pain and consequences. We follow our hearts and give into temptation with little to no regard about the consequences. Even the most strong-willed person is vulnerable to the deception of his/her own brain. We tend to forget (underestimate) how much pain we have been through in the past. 

Unfortunately, my brain has deceived me yesterday.

Oh it says to me “it won’t hurt”, “even if it did hurt, it won’t be too bad!”, “just take a pill afterwards and you’ll be fine” … oh I’m so mad I listened to those deceitful thoughts.

So, here’s what happened. I craved coffee and my brain tricked me into thinking It will be fine just having a little cup. I am aware caffeine and milk are triggers for me but I still fell into the trap of my deceitful brain. I ended up having a pumpkin spice latte.

About 3-4 hours later, it hits me. I couldn’t sleep because I wasn’t comfortable from this dull ache on my upper right abdomen; that pain soon turned into a stabbing pain. Then my lower bowels joined the party and starting aching … you’d think they are hurting because caffeine causes you to want to use the bathroom; well it was just the opposite yesterday, seemed like my bowels were holding everything hostage. I was so mad!!

I took medication but that didn’t seem like it was doing me any good. I had my heat pad wrapped around my abdomen all night until I finally fell asleep at 8AM.

This post is mainly a “note to self” kind of post. NEVER ever, ever & ever listen to those deceitful thoughts.

I’m sorry bowels for I have sinned and caused you so much unnecessary pain. Forgive me!

I hope you guys are doing better than I am this week.

Please feel free to share what your bowel “sin” is. Would love to hear your stories.

Live life to the fullest flavours.

stressed baker xo.

The attack of ……!? ~ A health issue post.

Hi guys,

Hope everyone is doing well.

I’m sorry for the lack of posts on the blog and Instagram the last few weeks. I haven’t been doing good; I have had a few health concerns and situations.

So, here’s what happened.

I have no idea what the hell happened but it felt like I was back to the starting line with my IBS. First off, I had an ache in my upper right abdomen that scared me to the point that I was thinking it was my gallbladder. The pain was a dull ache most of the time but then at night I would get super sharp stabbing pain , one of those stop breathing pains. I went back and forth to the Dr.  , had chest X-ray done and it turned out to be my freaking muscle spasming … you’d think a person would know the difference between muscle pain and gallbladder pain. Anyways, that pain lasted for a few weeks.

Fast forward, the next week I got really nauseous to the point that I couldn’t keep a meal down for 2 days. With that came insomnia, stomach aches, fatigue , weakness and dehydration. After the 2nd night, I couldn’t stand it any longer so I decided to head to the ER at 12 AM. Keep in mind, non of the medications I already have were helping the nausea was just too strong. In addition, for those two days I was on a plain diet .. so no triggers were involved in making my situation worse.

Anyways, got to the hospital , waited for an hour to see the Dr. .. Finally got in and the Dr decided to put an IV in .. fluids along with 3 different medications , I would tell you all what I was put on if I wasn’t so out of it from lack of food and sleep. The Dr. thinks that it was just a case of me eating something bad and subsequently triggering my IBS to the max. I tried to remember what I ate that caused this but nothing stood out as being the culprit. Also, it wasn’t food poisoning because I didn’t have any bowel changes in terms of diarrhoea that is often associated with food poisoning.

Got sent home with medications ..Thank god I was familiar with them and they weren’t UNKNOWN meds to my bowels. In this situation, I could hear my good friend and fellow spoonie’s voice yelling at me get on a plain diet ASAP! So I did.

The meds did me good for a few days but then I got the nauseous feeling all over again even though I was still on a plain diet. I was so miserable at this point … Lack of sleep + body over-reacting + overall weakness .. I was like a walking time bomb, anything would have caused me to let out the waterworks!
I started wishing I had some sort of medication that would take the nausea away and cause me to feel drowsy.. Gravol I yelled at my mom!!!!!!!
Gravol is a medication that is used to prevent and treat nausea, dizziness and vomiting due to motion sickness. I know I know I wasn’t sick because of motion but I had the same symptoms .. Tomatoes-Tomatos :p .. One of Gravol’s side effects is that it may cause drowsiness. From my past experiences with it , I have always felt drowsy after taking it.
It’s a Canadian product so I assumed I wouldn’t find it in Saudi Arabia. Regardless, I had to get up and check my carry-on bag (which I didn’t empty yet.. ooops) because I was praying that my 4 months ago self would have packed it for a “just incase situation” … Hallelujah , she did !!
I haven’t been so happy to see Gravol before. I took two pills and laid on the couch. I slowly started to doze off. I later woke up because I was feeling hungry. Hungry I say , I was shocked to be hungry because I didn’t have much of an appetite for the last week that I almost forgot what hungry was. So, I rushed my groggy self to the kitchen and had a light sandwich … I ate it like it was the first time I ever tasted a sandwich haha .. I was so grateful that the Gravol not only worked in taking away the nausea and made me drowsy but also because it brought back my appetite 😀
I then slept for 9 hours , which I was so thrilled about.
For the next few days I just took it easy , stayed on the meds, plain diet and slept whenever I felt like it.

Just wanted to update you guys as well as keep track of any health situations I may experience.

Live life to the fullest favours – even if your on a plain diet.

Mariann xo.